Pretentious Limericks and Dirty Haikus
welele:

ryl-e-coyote:

please remember that asexuality is not the same thing as “hates sex” or “doesn’t have sex” 

drunkvanity:

Fat gut, no butt.
Big tits, sharp wits.
Lumpy thighs, piercing eyes.
Double chin, for the win.
Lots of love for the chub club.

requirecookie:

therareandferociousswamprabbit:

daveyoufool:

Neither Courage Wolf nor Calming Manatee were doing much to help my anxiety, but I knew they were both on to something.

So, I created Calmage Wolfatee.

<3

This is glorious beyond my capacity to comprehend.

It’s okay, I’m used to it.
The saddest thing ever said. (via love-run-breathe-repeat)

He’s got his head in the clouds and his feet on the ground. His organs are stretched across forty miles of gradually thinning air. His spine, too thin to support him across such a height, snaps in the gusting wind. He’s got a long way to fall.

Work it harder, make it better. (x)